Fri. Dec 14, The 7502 Fifties Office Holiday Party: A Bi-Annual Tradition

When: 9pm

What we will serve: Punch, Jello Salads, Martinis.

What to bring: Willingness to embrace the devil-may-care spirit of the 50s office party. And beer.

Why: Office holiday parties, once, were awesome. As evidenced in that classic movie "The Apartment." Now, thanks to sexual harassment ligitation, gender equality, and quite probably, the flouridation of water, the same parties are shells of their former selves. We will recapture the traditional office party. That means mistletoe, ribaldry, inappropriate use of carbon paper, and Jason calling every girl "toots." Also, it was really awesome in 2005.

What to wear: Whatever you want, but, for guys, a white shirt and a skinny tie would be nice. For girls, I guess those one piece dresses that women wore in the 50s? You'd know better than us.

Whom to invite: Anyone who has not been roped into their office holiday party.

Whom to not invite: The litigation-minded.